Unfading
by fiesa
Summary: Luke sees traces of many people in his son. Some have left distinct impressions; some have carved themselves into Ben's soul. OneShot.


**Unfading**

_Summary: Luke sees traces of many people in his son. Some have left distinct impressions; some have carved themselves into Ben's soul. OneShot. _

_Warning: Spoilers for _Abyss_ in the Fate of the Jedi Series_

_Set: see Warning_

_Disclaimer: Standards apply. _

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* * *

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Some people say they can see themselves in their children as if they were looking into a mirror

Looking at Ben is nothing like that.

Luke Skywalker has seen a lot in his life and if he has learned something then it is that there is much more to a person than there is to the eye. His sixteen-, almost seventeen-years-old son carries himself with a calmness that roots in the Force, with a pride that he has inherited from his mother and with a kindness that makes Luke feel like crying on occasions. He has everything he needs to become a great Jedi Master once, Luke's successor, and already now he is infinitely proud of his son. There is nothing Ben could ever do to change this fact.

When he looks at Ben, Luke sees the traces of many people he knows in the young face before him. Some people have left distinct impressions; others have carved themselves into Ben's soul mercilessly and painfully.

But there are things he has inherited, or has picked up along the way of adulthood, too.

* * *

Luke sees Mara in his son, first and foremost.

He has Mara's eyes, Mara's face, Mara's instincts and her sense of duty and pride. Whenever he gets upset or stubborn, the likeness is even more distinct. But she isn't only in Ben's outer appearance but in his actions and his decisions as well. Sometimes Luke isn't entirely sure whether Ben actually thinks about what his mother would have done in order to do exactly the same or if he just has inherited her way of thinking. It probably is both.

Ben acts on instinct and on gut feeling. He is always determined to end whatever he has begun, to follow through with what he has decided on doing. He doesn't back down. He keeps his thoughts to himself mostly but whenever he knows he is right he will do anything to convince people. Like Mara forced Luke to confront the dark patches in his past, Ben forces his father to confront reality, to take up responsibility every day anew.

Like Mara has lit up his life, Ben is the reason why he hasn't given up yet.

* * *

Ben is his mother's son, but there are traces of a Solo in him, too.

And not only of one Solo but of many of them. Luke sees Leia in his son, in the way he talks to children and people who have lost themselves. It's pure kindness that shines from his eyes and that layers his voice. He has the same aura of competence and strength that Luke has come to associate with his twin sister. He is rational and more diplomatic than Luke ever will be – or, at least, that is what he believes. Luke hasn't been raised to rule a state, as Leia was, and he hasn't been taught to be the Grand Master of the New Jedi Order either. True, he has taken up the job and he does it quite well. But on the inside, Luke is still the naïve farm-boy Mara always called him. Ben will be a better Grand Master than he ever was.

* * *

Leia shines from Ben's eyes and is mirrored in his behavior. Han, Anakin and Jaina can be seen in Ben's soul.

Ben is reckless, as was and always would be Han Solo, the great hero and pilot and general and a dozen other things. It is partly the recklessness of youth and partly the same belief Han has nurtured for decades: That, as long as his family is with him, nothing can happen to him. Wars have proven him wrong; betrayals have changed his view of the world. But something of young Han Solo still remains and it is that what Luke sees in Ben.

Ben is Anakin all over and it hurts Luke to think about him. He has sent his nephew on a mission without return and even now, years later, it still haunts him. Anakin was strong; Anakin was one with the Force. Anakin would have found the way he and Jacen have so long been searching for, the right path to walk. Ben will find it one day, he is intelligent and brave and strong and kind just like Anakin. One day, in the future, when Luke won't be there anymore, his son will find the answers to the questions he himself has always avoided to face.

Jaina's fate is written in Ben's heart and Luke knows even though his niece is the Sword of the Jedi Ben has a fate no less lonely, dangerous and intimidating. The son of the two strongest Jedi of their age, his destiny has been written in the stars for a long time. He might not be able to read it and might never be but like Jaina, Ben is prepared to take up whatever comes, whatever he will have to do. Luke fears the day he has to place the burden of leadership on his son's stout shoulders. _He is so young._ But so has been he and so has been Jaina and this is the way it always was and will be.

* * *

Yes, looking at Ben Luke can see his family mirrored in his son's eyes and in his son's heart. But there is one person who hasn't only left an impression and an image but who has carved itself into the boy's soul, painfully and eternally. Jacen will always be there, the dark shadow Luke sometimes senses in Ben's thoughts. The questions, the fear and the _Why's _and _If only's_ are there, buried beneath the surface but never out of reach. Sometimes he thinks hating Jacen for what he has done to Ben would make him feel better. And then he knows that the fact that he might be able to forgive his student and nephew for the fact that he has killed millions of people but not for the fact that he has killed and tortured two people that were more important to Luke than his own life should make him fear _himself_. Jacen has killed Mara. Jacen has endangered Ben and tried to pull him to the Dark Side. Jacen has brought the fear and the threats unto the Jedi they now are dealing with and even though Luke has told him he forgave him he knows that forgiveness isn't that simple. But Ben has forgiven his cousin. And Luke thinks if his son can do so he might be able to do so, too, because Ben is what gives him strength and what makes him go on every day.

* * *

There are many more.

Luke sees Chewbacca in Ben, fiercely loyal and brave.

He sees Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru, worn and tired and still loving him with everything they have, with every flaw his character exhibits.

He sees his mother in his son, or at least what he knows about her. He sees her beauty and her strength and determination and her belief that everything will turn out right in the end.

Sometimes, he sees old Ben Kenobi in Ben, wise and well-experienced, calm and kind.

And Tahiri. There is a piece of Tahiri in Ben, imprinted on him when he decided to save her, to pull her back from the Dark Side. It's nothing romantic or family-like but a bond forged between two people who have endured the same things and Tahiri's pain and anger and hopelessness and determination are mirrored in Ben as his strength, hope, belief and fear are mirrored in her.

* * *

Sometimes, it is the _young_ Anakin, impatient and intent on using the Force like a tool. Sometimes, it is Mara, chiding him for not seeing the obvious. Sometimes, it is Leia, telling him what he already knows but has to be told anyway, or Han, yelling and cursing and fiercely protective of his family. Sometimes it is Jaina, strong and lonely and determined to fulfill her destiny. And sometimes, he only sees Ben.

Ben.

His beloved son, his family. The one thing more important to him than anything else ever could be. Mara has loved Ben more than her life and Luke loves him like that, too. Not because he is everything that remains from his dead wife. Not because he is his son and because it is his duty to love and to teach him. No, Luke loves him because he is _Ben_, because he is the way he is and whatever he does, he will always stay his son.

* * *

One day he will have to lay enormous responsibility on his son's shoulders.

One day he will have to leave him and he wishes he could suspend that moment forever. But thinking thoughts like that are dangerous. Ben isn't the only being in the galaxy; Ben isn't the most important person in the universe. There are so many more. But that is exactly what a father is supposed to be feeling, Luke is quite sure. Ben can shout at him and ignore him, snap at him and be annoyed any way he likes to but he will never, ever be able to change the fact that he is his son. He's more than relieved that Ben is alright, that he hasn't succumbed to the illness all the other young Jedi have contracted. Because if the same was to happen to Ben as had happened to Jysella and Valin and the others Luke wasn't be sure whether he would find the strength to go on. Like the Horns did, for example.

It's not good for a Jedi Master to think like that. But now that Mara's gone and has entrusted him with her greatest inheritance he cannot and will not endanger it. He'll send Ben on missions, true. He'll let him be the Jedi Knight Ben desires to be. But there is a boundary he won't ever cross again. Ben won't be lost to the world, not in the way Jacen was lost, not in the way Mara was lost.

* * *

Not in the way Luke is lost.

Whenever Luke looks at Ben, he sees many people mirrored in the features of his son's face. But whatever he does, he does not see a piece of himself.

Maybe that is good.

* * *

_A/N: I don't mean to say that there is _nothing _of Luke in Ben. It's just that Luke doesn't see himself in his son. To his mind, Ben is a person of his own that carries all the character traits Luke knows from his family. Plus, he doesn't want Ben to have to go through everything he had to go through in life, so maybe he's just refusing to see the similarities. Who knows. _


End file.
